So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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