I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
