we have officially mastered the walk of shame
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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