She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize