Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
