This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Randomize
