i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Edward fifth and chaser hands
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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