oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
