Define "chronic" masturbator.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
