Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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