Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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