I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
The uberlube is also flammable
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
