Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
