If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
