glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
