Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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