this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
