You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
