I need help removing her.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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