my soul wont recognize me after tonight
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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