he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
