No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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