I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
