also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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