One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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