Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
