I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize