So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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