This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
