I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
