eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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