what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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