I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
