i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
