So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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