if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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