Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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