well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
