The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
