Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
