Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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