And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
