its not stalking. its research.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
