Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
