How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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