Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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