I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
