Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
