how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
