i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
