I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
