I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
